Just Another Dick

by Ron Morley

spoof

cast: minimum 12 actors, with doubling

90 minutes

adult content

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In this farcical adaptation of Shakespeare's Richard III, Trey Dick is a natural born hunchback with a clubfoot and a host of personality disorders. He has never wanted to be an actor, but he has always had a burning desire to play Richard the Third. Well, now that his family has taken over a theater and launched their own rendition of the play will he get his chance? “No”, he tells us in the opening monologue that interrupts a rehearsal. His older brothers play both the lead and its understudy while Trey continues to play the part that was so helpful in taking over the theater in the first place: usher.
Taking us down a path eerily remnant of the one traveled by the Duke of Gloucester in the original play, Trey narrates the elimination of his brothers and others on his way to take the lead part.


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                                                      CHARACTERS
                                     A minimum of 12 actors are needed

TREY DICK   Just another hunchback.
BUCK SUCCUP    About Treys age, but not a hunchback; plays Buckingham
SLAPPY DICK    mid- late teens; plays a halberd holder
HAPPY DICK    Older than Trey and Gumo; plays Richard III
RUSH CHAMBERLIN    About Happy's age; plays Hastings
GUMO DICK     Between Happy and Trey; plays Clarence/understudy for R III
EAR L CREEK  Around Trey's age; plays Rivers
RICHIE  A little younger than Trey; plays Richmond
LIZ CREEK-DICK  About Trey's age; plays Queen Elizabeth
ANNIE LANCASTER  A little older than Slappy; plays Anne
MAGGIE LANCASTER  Oldest in the cast; plays Queen Margaret
MAMA DICK  Younger than Maggie, but older than Happy; plays Duchess York
CREW MEMBER  Annie's age; plays Anne
SANTA   Rush's age or older; plays Hastings
ELVINGHAM    Earl's age; plays Buckingham
MIME    Ageless; plays Queen Margaret
GHOST 1    Ancient
GHOST2    Jamaican